The Life Before Mullet Fingers
by imaginelife44
Summary: What happened before Roy moved to Coconut Cove? This exciting story reveals secret untold by Mullet himself, but by Beatrice.


Nap sat there staring at his ceiling. His bare feet swayed like they had nothing else to do. What could he do? Everything seemed like it had been slipped away from underneath him. Literally. He wasn't quite too pleased that he was sitting on the uncomfortably lumpy floor of his bedroom. Or what used to be his bedroom. He was moving all the way to Coconut Cove, Florida. For a kid only twelve years old what could he do to stop his mom from marrying that no good rotten basketball star? (If you really wanted to call him a star.) Nap knew there was no point in stopping the wedding. His mother had several husbands in the past and none of them lasted for more than a year or two. And by several I mean _several._ There was no way this one was going to be any different.

Nap's mother was a cheerleader for the Florida Gators. She met _Mr. Leep_ at some Florida party. She demanded that Nap would never address him other wise though he tried hard to resist calling him Mr. Leep Frog. Anyway the party was an award ceremony in honor of the Gators Basketball Team. Why it was held, no one was quite sure. The team had faced a seven game losing streak that year. Not much to celebrate. Mr. Leep Frog had the award for the only basket scored that season. It was bounced on his head quite hard and managed to make it in the hoop, thus knocking Leep Frog out for several hours. How his mother managed to find this detail about the clumsy man attractive was beyond his concern. He thought that maybe, just maybe, that Lonna Bridger would forget about her hates for Nap, and he would finally be a part of a real family. Although the odds of that happening was one in a million.

Nap could think of many ways to stop the marriage. For one, he could rip holes in the dress and claim moths had done it. Lonna was stupid enough not to realize it would take weeks for moths to chew that much. Or even better, paint Lonna's windshield right before the wedding, making it impossible for her to make it in time. (For she was very picky when it came to riding in taxis. If the seats weren't leather she would always say, "No way, Jose!" Which surprisingly was often the driver's name.) But Nap saw no point in using any of these plans. What harm would it do him to have another step dad? None that he could see, but Leep Frog was a strange man.

_At least I'll still be on the beach, _thought Nap. But the thought of sleeping on the floor for two whole days with no blankets or anything didn't make the idea any better. Nap scratched at is head tangling his bleached blonde hair even more. He looked down at his blue stained shirt he had gotten as his only birthday present two years ago. It was quite small, but it was only one of the four shirts he owned. He leaned against the wall and sighed. Another day wasted sitting in his room. Lonna refused to let him outside before the wedding thinking he might run away. Again. Nap was a well-known runner. He could run as fast as a cheetah maybe even faster. But being locked out made him a slug. He also was great at hiding. He could fit himself into any beaver den or hollowed out tree. The last time he ran away was after the fourth husband. The dude obviously didn't like children and sent Nap to his room every moment he could for something silly like coloring outside the lines or spilling his milk. Finally, Nap couldn't take it any more. So he ran. He ran faster than any boy his age could ever dream about. He ran all the way to the border of Alabama until a cop caught up to him and started an interrogation. In no time he was back in the house sitting on his old bed, being scolded by his stepfather. Luckily, soon after that Lonna and he split up.

Nap was feeling hungry so he stood up and walked to the kitchen. The apartment was almost completely empty except for the table in the eating area and the bed in Lonna's room. It felt good to finally be moving out of the stuffy living space. There was hardly enough room for one person! But living with Lonna meant that no matter what house he lived in, it would never be his home.

As he reached toward the cupboard he noticed something odd. The initials "LL" were carved into the wooden surface. No doubt they stood for "Lonna Leep"._ Wow_, thought Nap. _She's really got the hots for this guy._ Just as Nap reached for a pack of Oreos, he heard the shriek of the one and only, raging Lonna.

"NAPOLEON A. BRIDGER!" she shouted. _Ugh, that name!_ Nap thought to himself. No matter how hard he tried he could never convince his mother to call him something decent. Thus he became accustom to calling himself Nap, since of course he could think of no other nickname that suited him.

"What did I do now?" he asked.

"What did you do? WHAT DID YOU DO?! You know perfectly well what you did young man." She shouted quite loudly at him. Nap could have sworn he saw dust fall from the ceiling.

"Surprise me," he said calmly. He was used to the sudden outbursts from his mother.

Lonna, not in the mood for small talk stormed away and did not return until she was dressed. (Before she was wearing a hot pink bathrobe and curlers the size of soda cans.) Now she wore a bright yellow tank top and a miniskirt. Her hair looked tangled and the curls lopsided. Why she waited until mid afternoon to get ready for the day, Nap hadn't a clue. "Are you going to tell me what I did now?" Nap spoke with no fear in his voice, but Lonna could be very unpredictable. He didn't know what could happen.

"Well Napoleon," she started. Nap's face cringed at his name. "I was about to lend you a blanket for the night but after seeing this I may think otherwise!" Lonna held up her rhinestone toothbrush. There crawling on the bristles was a fat and furry caterpillar. Nap grinned. He loved caterpillars. But from the look on Lonna's face, he knew this was the wrong reaction. "I KNEW IT!" she screamed. "I KNEW YOU HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH THIS!" The caterpillar started climbing up her thumb. She shrieked and dropped the toothbrush into the trashcan. Nap tried hard to resist a giggle, but this only agitated her more. "THAT'S IT! YOU'RE GOING TO SCRUB THIS TOOTHBRUSH UNTIL YOUR HANDS ARE NUMB, GOT IT TWERP?!" Lonna's voice seemed to echo through the entire apartment like some kind of megaphone. Then she stormed away again, except this time she didn't return.

Nap picked up the toothbrush out of the trash trying hard to avoid getting any leftover peanut butter and jelly sandwich on his arm. Then, he carried the caterpillar to the balcony and let it outside. On his way back to the sink he spotted a letter addressed to Nap. It read:

Napoleon Bridger:

Due to certain mistakes that have happened in your past, your application has been accepted into The Alabama Military School for Junior Misfits otherwise known as the AMS. We hope as you spend the three years you requested in the school, that the priorities in your life will soon change. We are anxious to meet you this up coming September. Since you will be staying for a lengthy amount of time, we would like you to pack as listed below:

-Toiletries

-Writing Utensils

-Paper

-Casual Wear

A jump suit will be provided for outdoor activities. Again, we look forward to meeting you this fall. We do hope you will enjoy your stay, and change your way.

Sincerely,

Captain Hawser

_Military School?_ thought Nap. _Military School?! _Surely this was all a dream. He was used to Lonna disliking him, but Military School? He never realizes his mother hated him so much. Nap had never done anything wrong, (if you didn't count the running away part, but in his defense I would've totally agreed to that). Nap just never had the same mother-son relationship that the other kids his age had. Twelve years had passed and still nothing clicked between them. Nap wasn't like any of the normal children. He had no friends, (unless you counted the neighbors dog or the fish in the creek of Welbourne Road) and he was home schooled by some goof who had know idea what he was doing sitting in the same room with Nap. All this made Nap wonder, _Had she ever wanted me? Had I just been in her way all this time?_ Nap walked over to the sink pondering over the letter. He had always kept to himself. He never bothered anyone for all he knew.

He turned on the faucet. Blankly, he held the toothbrush under the falling water and started to scrub whatever was on it that Lonna wanted off. He wanted to run. Run in circles. Run to Canada. Whatever it took to get away from his life, from Lonna, from everything he ever had to live with. But it was too late for running, in three days Lonna would be marrying Leep Frog, he would go to Military School, and his life will be ruined. Nothing in the world could save him.


End file.
